Uranus Cafe Rectum Room

1800 Universe

2008-03-17T06:47:00.000-07:00

I have decided to take a new direction with this blog. I am going to talk to the universe everyday....well as often as possible! (Just to let "it" know what I think!)

Hey Universe...thanks for the spectacular sunrise this morning in western Pennsylvania! It's a little bit cold, though, so I would like to put in an order for some warmer, drier weather down here!

Thanks for the traffic you have been sending my way...to my other websites, that is. Uranus Cafe could use some friends who are also interested in calling 1800Universe to say thanks and express their hearts' desires!

Money would be nice....and lots of it! I'd love to see the money come in via my websites! Especially IntelligentMotionDesign.com. I love creating new ideas to celebrate intelligent motion....which is just about everything we can conceive of here on planet Earth!

Let me show you two of my favorite designs.... for the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Pittsburgh Pirates...naturally! I also have intelligent motion design for all kinds of sports, businesses, recreational activities and kids! You can custom order and personalize your own....just email me, or
post a response here! Check it out!

www.IntelligentMotionDesign.com

Thanks, Universe for letting these "kooky" and interesting designs for websites and products fly into my head. I have never had so much fun in my life!

Google for Boomers

2008-01-23T08:56:00.000-08:00

Who knew? Google is both a noun and a verb. My baby boomer husband sheepishly admits that he doesn't know how to google. My 80 year old father doesn't know his email address....but boasts that he has one. When I asked him for his email address he proudly replied: "dklemma". When I asked him where....he said he had no idea like this was normal.

So, you boomers who google out there, let's help out our fellow quickly graying generation. Be patient...don't scoff. If a member of your peer group (or older) doesn't understand the google phenomenon, just slowly explain to them how to get on the google search engine. I think it will change their life.

I am 55 years old and have a lot to learn...especially when it comes to computers. I have to admit though, that when I talk to my husband or my dad, I feel like a true geek!

TDF

Protect our Kids

2008-01-03T06:58:00.000-08:00

Here's something to ponder for the New Year. FYI...small town America may not be the safest choice for raising children these days. Butler, Pa. is the birthplace of the Bantam car, the Jeep, the Pullman Railroad Car, and the organization known as Hare Krishna (USA division). Sounds like an interesting community with some creative genius activity in the air....right?

Sadly enough, at this time, a confessed child molester is being publicly supported by the mayor of the city of Butler and several other prominent local citizens. The confessed molester is not incarcerated, nor has he been required to register as a sexual predator. Instead, the mayor and her some of her associates have taken up the cause to have the molester re-instated into the community, even going so far as to refer to him as a member of the "cultural elite"!

For futher information, google Butler, Pa. You will be astonished.

TF

Company Christmas Parties

2007-12-09T05:58:00.000-08:00

So...I just have to ask...what's up with the company Christmas parties? I attended one of these annual business bashes last night, and to tell the truth, I don't think anyone wanted to be there. The party was scheduled for an early hour (5pm) because everyone wanted to leave early enough to do something else with their free time on a Saturday night.

I thought parties were supposed to be fun. I have to admit, I really dread hearing the Electric Slide played at these events and watching the denizens of the business cubicles line up and move in mechanical unison. Ugh! Whoever came up with the choreography for the Electric Slide wasn't even listening to the music....it just doesn't fit!

So..bah humbug. Let's skip these boring parties and go have some real fun. Invite your friends for the Uranus Cafe bake off challenge or at least play bingo.

...Turd Ferguson

rbST in Milk!

2007-11-19T14:38:00.000-08:00

I buy certified raw milk directly from a local dairy farm. Here is part of the reason why:

Your Right to Know: Pennsylvania Restricts rBGH-Free Dairy Labels

Several large dairy producers and food companies have made news recently by getting rid of recombinant bovine growth hormone, also known as rBGH or rBST, from their milk supply. This is great news for consumers, since this genetically engineered growth hormone is known to cause harm to cows and may pose health risks to humans. But in Pennsylvania, things appear to be going backwards.

FDA approved the use of voluntary labels more than 12 years ago at the request of dairy companies seeking to respond to customer concerns over the use of the genetically engineered hormone. Earlier this year Monsanto, the company that makes rBGH under the trade name Posilac, pressured the FDA to restrict the use of labels identifying “rBGH-free” or “rBST-free” dairy products, claiming such labels are "misleading" to consumers. FDA rightly refused Monsanto’s request to restrict consumers’ right to know, but now the Pennsylvania Department of Agriculture (PDA) seems to following Monsanto’s lead. In October, the PDA announced new regulations that appear to prohibit any kind of rBGH-free labeling on dairy products, including "rBGH (rBST)-Free" and wording such as "Our farmers pledge not to use . . ."

Consumers want more information about the foods they buy and feed to their families – not less. rBGH-Free labels are not “misleading,” they fill an important gap in knowledge about how our dairy products are produced.

Protect Your Right to Know! send an email to Governor Rendell to him know you do not find rBGH-free labels to be “misleading,” and you do not want their use restricted!

Visit CertifiedRawMilk.com

-KB

Seneca Valley Teachers Strike

2007-11-07T06:10:00.000-08:00

In a western Pennsylvania community near Evans City, Pa., teachers went out on strike on October 15th because they were not satisfied with their board of directors' contract proposals. Attempts at negotiations have proven to be futile.

Who is really suffering here? Is it the teachers, because, as they see it, they are working for less than the wages they deserve, or the students, because they are not getting the education they are entitled to?

I thought it was common knowledge that a teachers salary is not a quick route on the road to riches and maybe this is unfair or unfortunate, but it is a fact of life.

These instructors chose their career path, and if it is more income they are seeking, then let them take on a second job as an additional source of income or get a different job.

Demanding what amounts to a 6% increase compounding over 5 years is way out of line, in my opinion and in the opinion of the Seneca Valley community affected by this strike. If you choose to become a public school teacher, then you must realize what you are getting yourself into. It seems to me that many young college students decide to pursue elementary and secondary education careers because it this an easy choice for them, and they really haven't considered all of their options. I wonder just how much thought they gave to what they wanted to do with their lives. Then, once they are employed by the public education system, are they disillusioned and disappointed? If this is the case, then by all means I would suggest they make a career change....go back to school and start over.

It is just so sad that the children are obviously not the first priority in the minds of most of these teachers. Where are the teachers who are passionate about what they are contributing to the minds and futures of our young students? We are seeing more passion about the almighty dollar.

Asses of the day: Seneca Valley Striking Teachers
Seneca Valley High School
Jackson Township, Pennsylvania

KB

Cotton from Sheep?

2007-10-27T14:06:00.000-07:00

My cousin Rosie gave me a copy of an article published by Time magazine purportedly in their special edition on global warming. Rosie gave me a photo copy of page 103. I don't have a copy of the magazine, but would like to locate one.

Tip number 7 tells us yet another way to reduce our carbon footprint:
"You could make your own clothes with needle and thread using 100% organic cotton sheared from sheep you raised on a Whole Foods Diet."

I am not kidding. This is quoted verbatim.

You realize, of course, as Rosie pointed out to me, that this changes our perception of history. We always thought the slaves were picking cotton, when they were really shearing sheep!

Rosie's friend Sandy Simpson pointed out to us that she gets her lavender from French Sheep, and her Egyptian cotton from Egyptian sheep. Wonder where pima cotton comes from? Must be the pima sheep!

Kathleen

The Italian Who Went to New York

2007-10-27T12:26:00.001-07:00

Found this cute ditty on a postcard, but I have heard it told before....
The Italian Who Went to New York:

One day Ima go to to a bigga hotel. I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I want two piss toast. She branga me only wonna piss. I tella her I wanna two piss, she say go to the toilet..
I say you no unnerstand. I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you better not piss on the plate you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady ana she calla me sonna ma bitch.

Later, I go to eat soma lunch at Emma's Restaurant, the waitress brings me a spoon, ana knife, but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock. She tellsa me everybody wanna fock. I tell her no, you no unnerstand, I wanna fock on the table. She say you better not fock on the table you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she calls me a sonna ma bitch.

So I go back to my room inna hotel an there's no sheet on my bed. I calla the manager ana tell him I wanna sheet. He tells me to go to the toilet. So I say you no unnerstand, I wanna sheet ona the bed. He say you better not sheet on the bed, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the man ana he call me sonna ma bitch.

I go to check out and the man at the the desk, he say peace to you. I say piss on you took you sonna ma bitch.

I go back to Italy!!

Kathleen

Septic Tank Diver

2007-10-18T08:11:00.000-07:00

Channel 4 Action News in Pittsburgh had a lead in story yesterday about a man who fell into a septic tank. He was trapped in the underground tank for several hours until he was rescued. The reporter went into details about the odor involved....do we really need to hear about these types of unfortunate incidents? What purpose does this type of reporting really serve? Are they really trying to tell us not to jump into a septic tank? This poor gentleman had the ultimate Uranus Cafe experience.

What makes you Scratch Uranus?

2007-10-17T05:49:00.000-07:00

Have you scratched Uranus today?
What makes you stop and think about what the world is really about?

What is your opinion of Hillary Clinton?

What do you think about the autism controversy?

What do you think about the "huge" obesity problem?

What do you think has happened to personal responsibility?

What do you think about capital punishment?

What do you think about our trade relations with China?

Post your thoughts here....and please tell us your funny stories too!

What makes you stop and scratch Uranus?

New Sport

2007-10-16T11:04:00.000-07:00

Another topic of interest....the new sport of Parkour. Has anyone heard of it?